“Don’t Shoot,I’ll Stop Talking “

It may appear to be a nothing statement.

It may also appear to be ridiculous, however in a time when it seems like everyone is looking for answers to school shootings.

My Take:

Some have determined that the best answer is “Arming Teachers”.and it looks like this idea is gaining popularity.

For those that may not know it , there is a state of emergency in our nation.

There have been many school shootings and I will avoid adding all types of data and dates to expand this blog.

I will also avoid the gory details and carnage of the families, the broken as well as unending grief.

As a parent and grandparent I can only imagine the anger and sense of “Not Again” that some parents,siblings and peer are forced to revisit.

I watch with the rest of America as the story of the most recent story became Our Story”

I got angry, like everyone got angry and frustrated like everyone got frustrated because this is not good.

This is not the norm and this is not fair.

If you are familiar with my blogs you have had an opportunity to witness my varying point of view when come to life and family or even relationships.

Before I began writing I had no outlet or platform to share what I’ve often referred to as being an abstract thinker.

So, while our President, The F.B.I and the world are working feverishly to solve the problem of school shooting and keeping our children safe I wanted to offer an anecdote, a point of view ( my 2 cents)

There appears to be a lot of conversation about mental illness but also some discussion about being lonely and being a loner.

What is also interesting is that as the research is provided we see many of the young shooters have a history of being sad or anger and that causes them to be separated from family and in some cases make it impossible to have friends.

There story is told by their peers, some former friends and neighbors and even parents

Former teachers and law enforcement have offered history at times.

Who, What, When, Where, How and Why :

As an individual that is known to be a youth advocate as well as a family support person, I receive calls. Did you here? Have you heard?

“My point of view will not be what you think” would be my reply.

“I want to hear this” is what they will say.

Once I lay it out, there is dead silence.

No one will dare argue. At least in my presence.

They realize by my “Point of view “ connected to my passion that I believe in what I am saying.

IT IS NOT AN OPINION:

I want to understand what is going on and at the same time provide a clear idea of what we must do to see to it that it doesn’t happen again.

Every television and radio station schools and anywhere that there are people, will listen and come to conclusions about what must be done.

I’m thinking and it hit me.

How will I get a world of mourners and angry people to believe that the problem itself has provided our solution.

Teachers with guns?

This is an example of what some believe will solve the problem of school shootings and at the same time keep our children safe.

The teachers have a difficult job to begin with and along with teaching they are responsible for law and order.

Some of our teachers have to deal with conflict among their class.

Many teachers are dealing with difficult students that hurl insults at them as well as fellow classmates.

They need to get cooperation from their class and at the same time “Have a gun?”

This can never work and I am not willing to take the time to explain why, however I will say this.

There can be no chance or opportunity for the children to know who is the “Designated Teachers”

There can be no way to do a drill or practice a real life scenario.

There is a will always be a child that will want push the boundaries or with the help of fellow students attempt to try to disarm them (the teachers).

See What I Mean?

Oh, I have one more.

What happens the first time that a student claims that a teacher threatened to shoot them or as our title suggests “ Will You Shoot Me If I Refuse To Sit Still?”or stop talking.

Schools have changed so much in the last 40-50 years.

One thing that hasn’t is rule enforcement.

As I visit school I’ve notice one thing across the board, from school to school.

The teacher has changed and their role has changed.

Most schools have a zero tolerance policy.

What is this?

The definition of insubordination has broadened.

And as a rule most teachers have added (endless) responsibilities.

Parent.

Security.

Social worker.

Mind reader.

With the demands of “ No Child Left Behind “

They must in many schools also become “magicians”

Because many of the children have no idea of why they go to school or how to behave and the teachers in many cases have no power to hold them due to limited resources and services as well as parent pressure.

What To Do?

Schools in the 60’s and 70’s were a lot like schools today.

At least as far as the setting,

Building.

Classrooms

Cafeteria.

Gymnasiums.

The formula worked so why change it?

There is one difference however and it’s a big one.

The teachers are now exported.

Huh?

The teachers in many of our schools do not live in community where they teach.

This has made it difficult for many of our Black and Brown students because what they ((The Teachers) know is in some cases based on what is on television o in movies.

In the 60’s and 70’s there was lots community involvement and this was also based on the idea that our teachers were residents or our community.

Discipline was a very important part of our life education and somewhere between then and now discipline lost its meaning or at least began to become a “Bad” thing.

Discipline:

noun

training to act in accordance with rules; drill: military discipline.

activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill; training: A daily stint at the typewriter is excellent discipline for a writer.

punishment inflicted by way of correction and training.

the rigor or training effect of experience, adversity, etc.: the harsh discipline of poverty.

behavior in accord with rules of conduct; behavior and order maintained by training and control: good discipline in an army.

a set or system of rules and regulations.

dictionary.com

Hmm:

Training to act in accordance to the rules.

Activity, exercise or regimen that develops a skill.

Also in the early years of America’s short history discipline was handed out by the teacher.

It may be hard to imagine but the teachers had the command of their class and if something came up that had gotten out of hand there was always a teacher in the room next door that would intervene.

There are many things that I remember about my early years of school but, nothing was more than the idea that students had what had become known as “Home Training”

The students spoke to the adults with whole sentences.

Our teachers would say “Good Morning Class” and our response would always be “Good Morning Mr./Ms.———,

Communication was not a key, communication was the key and the parents led the charge.

Something has happened in the years that would follow and I must say I didn’t see it coming.

Parents were no longer willing or able to guide and prepare their child.

What Happened?

Today as I sit in my car and complete this blog on a sunny 60 degree day in Chicago I observe a young man outside my car saying (Chanting)

“Who gon’ ride fah me? Who gon’ die fah me?

Who gon’ let dem hollow tips fly fah me?

Huh?

There are many people that have come to the conclusion that “Rap, Trap Or Hip-Hop” music is the culprit.

I consider any word or group of word repeated over and over in many songs a “Mantra “ -Arnoldmrdadtate l-

Yes I said it, our children are casting spells on themselves.-Arnoldmrdadtate-

While I am willing to give all music credit for the demise of humankind, I must ask the question

“ When did music replace parents or become a substitute for friends and family communication”

-Arnoldmrdadtate-

This reminds me of a story from my youth called “The Pied Piper of Hamelin “

This is an interesting read and in many ways a cautionary tale.

There are also many adaptations of this story the oldest was about the extermination of rats.

The version that I am most familiar with has to do with a charismatic piper that seduced the local children to follow him and the children all died.

Scary Huh?

This story scared me and many of my friends when I was a boy, but as I think about it today our children are most vulnerable when they are let to themselves.

We don’t speak to them.

We don’t allow our neighbors to speak to them.

We don’t allow the police to speak to them.

We won’t allow their teachers to speak to them.

But they are allowed television,radio and social media without monitor or filter.

When did we begin to think it was okay to stop speaking to our children.

Children’s Television Programming was a gateway and allowed many parents a reprieve or a break in the 70’s.

Parents may have the entire Saturday morning to themselves (Cartoons)

The television has become a major programming system for adults so why not our children?

This subject I will deal with in depth in a future blog.

It is a heavy subject and it will offer support both parents and guardians alike.

I merely wanted to share this because I needed to offer a cause to the effect of our children’s behavior.

Also we needed to see how we all have contributed to the present world view of “Youthscape”

Youthscape is my own word.My definition of when young people are left to themselves and become trapped in a parallel idea of f the uselessness of Adult.

Arnoldmrdadtate

Now The Anecdote:

Solving the problems of school shooting and how to fix it has been and will be argued in years to come because it is viewed as a gun problem.

If that is our solution then why would we think that adding guns to this problem could ever be a legitimate solution.- Arnoldmrdadtate –

There are many people much smarter than I am that will speak more loudly and will get much more airtime and audiences than I ever will that will patch this dilemma. but they will not repair it.

You see,hidden within this blog is our answer.

It will take a lot of work as well as training and retraining.

It starts and home and if it doesn’t happen there then we have our schools.

Our children must learn that we are present.

Speak to them. Each day and when we speak we must look at and they must look at us.

We must listen to them and allow them to speak .

When they speak we must realize that when they want our opinion or input they will ask for it.

Sometimes they will tell us about people places and things but do not need directions or corrections.

We must touch them and hug them and use full sentences in our communication.

I love you.not,love you

This Is A Big One.

We must show them a better, more excellent way.

What Can Our Schools Do?

In the 60’s and 70’s our teachers spoke to children, all children they looked at them (The Child) and encouraged them to look at them (The Teachers)

The teachers have to identify the children that are having difficulty communicating (Bullies,the bullied,shy and distant) and because classrooms are a small community our teachers need support people to help with these needs before children give up on themselves.

When a student has a smile from an adult ( just like infants learn to smile from their parents)they will smile.

In the 60’s and 70’s the coaches and gym teachers would help with difficult student situations by inviting the students an opportunity to join or tryout for one of their teams.

And finally.

In the 69’s and 70’s many teachers visited the homes.

I realize that this is a difficult and often impossible task but, we must use all of our resources and even create new one to get the parents onboard in order to support our children as we attempt to redirect our students direction and goal setting.

Respond, Don’t React nor Report

We must utilize our Nurses and Psychologist and Social workers .

Les Brown on Twitter: “”If there is no enemy within, the enemy outside can do you no harm.”~African Proverb” wikipedia.com

Final Thoughts:

I believe like most people that children are not responsible for their existence.

They are the result and responsibility of not one but 2 parents and that their parents in many cases do not have the education or tools to do it by themselves.

I am an advocate of parenting classes.

And I realize that sometimes that isn’t enough.

My position is that once they ( The Children) are here we as (The Village) have the power to be the change.

We all needed help at some point in our lives.

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